It is too late not to have my name

Even though it's a quilt pattern.

And it means penis in Urdu.

Even though someone with my name writes bible stories.

And the two Rs together feel awkward, like a mouthful of gauze.

Even though my father called me Joe Pete. And also Annie Laurie.

Even though my in-laws tried to re-name me Sara Zahra.

Even though I would have made a good Ellie

it is too late not to have my name.